


The truths we keep

by DysgraphicBean



Category: Highschool DxD (Anime), Persona 3, Persona 5, Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor
Genre: Drabble, Gen, I wrote this a long time ago, Overlord!Kazuya Minegishi, Post-Persona 5, following along with the plot of Highschool DxD, for now, have at least 2 or 3 more chapters of this written just in need of revision, post-devil survivor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:01:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22578247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DysgraphicBean/pseuds/DysgraphicBean
Summary: Your world is filled with pain when you come to your senses.Hot blinding pain that assaults your frayed nerves, your mouth and throat, impossibly dry, don’t even allow you the small mercy of being able to scream in agony.Kazuya Minegishi, that is your name and now as you come back to a world that has nothing left to offer you what are you expected to do?Survive, of course.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 22





	1. Liberation

**Author's Note:**

> First fanfic I guess. Noticed I have a shit ton of started but unfinished fics everywhere and that even if I drop this I'd be happy to just inspire someone so here. Have at least 2 or 3 more chapters of similar length written just in need of revision and beta so look forward to that if you enjoy this!
> 
> English isn't my first language so please be patient with me and feel free to point out mistakes!
> 
> Edit 11/02: Altered a bunch of stuff because as I said it was written a long time ago and I feel like I made Kazuya too inconsistent. The continuity of events is still the same but now it should flow better and make more sense. (Rest assured I won't make an habit of changing things in chapters already posted from here on out)

Your world is filled with pain when you come to your senses.

Hot blinding pain that assaults your frayed nerves, your mouth and throat, impossibly dry, don’t even allow you the small mercy of being able to scream in agony.

When you feel the trails of hot liquid run down your face it takes longer than it should probably have for you to recognize them as tears. Another minute and you finally feel your chest heaving and aching with mute, desperate sobs as your lungs desperately suck in the air that was denied to them for so long. And then, as if mocking the temporary relief, a different agonizing pain erupts, this one you vaguely recognize.

The muscles in your back burn from the strain of (not so foreign anymore) appendages being forced out from your flesh. Back then, when you’d been less worried about the changes in your body and the effects the new power might have on your existence, you had been at your cousin’s apartment. As you lazily drifted off with your head on your cousin's lap(you can’t recall anymore what Cain had been doing, typing away at his computer most likely)his hand absently patting you as if the affection and care were normal in your relationship, you felt it.

Bones, nerves and blood rushing to grow and appear in an alien way. You're sure you must've screamed back then, but the only thing that had stuck with you was his expression of absolute panic.

You'd never admit it, but that expression made you happy, that expression proved he cared that perhaps the easy affection was more than a trade-off for using you.

Back then you tended to forget a lot of things and believe hope for a lot of lies to become reality.

The wings on your back had since then become a source of comfort because they would always be associated with that expression.

Now though… now the pain comes back in full, but you're unable to pass out like back then, the accumulated power and adrenaline inside you keeping you awake and aware.

Inside, the part of you that recognizes himself as The Demon King panics, anticipating certain death, expecting to be turned to dust once all your energy and power runs dry.

The part of you that recognizes himself as Abel, God's favoured, cries for a father that isn't there, cries for repentance and forgiveness, cowering in the face of punishment.

Kazuya Minegishi, however, speaks louder, as he always has. You're human, merely and simply human.

This crystal won't kill you.

You force your body to relax, ignoring the pain. Even as your wings are seemingly being ripped from your back, horns turning into a familiar object, power being drained by what feels like hungry leeches, you still your mind.

You count down in your head and will yourself to breath and endure. Once your throat decides to work, you do it out loud, in between pitiful whimpers and heavy breathing.

The wings snap cleanly off of your back with a final surge of pain, your horns stop being horns and the headphones you had tended to lovingly for so long fall to the floor shattering on impact as if they had never been anything more than pieces of plastic and metal.

You let it consume everything you have, this seal is made to kill The Demon King, Abel, should he awaken, not a human boy made of flesh and blood, it'll let go.

After what feels like hours it does.

You fall to your knees, tired and breathing harshly, but free.

As you reach out inside of you, you feel your powers answering weakly, truly drained. Not completely, you hope, you worked too hard to get them.

You know instinctively that you are currently in hell. You feel, more than hear, creatures coming.

You need to leave...

You need...

“Na...!” you slap your mouth shut with your own hand, wincing at the sharp pain.

Don't panic... Not now...

You clutch the medallion on your cape and feel yourself relax. He's here... he's here with you...

His soul vibrates lightly in your hand.

‘I'm okay’ he seems to say ‘We need to leave, cousin’ the frantic glow seems to communicate. (in reality, he says nothing, of course, because he can’t)

Right, leaving.

You nuzzle the medallion before breathing deeply and removing it from where it holds your long cape together, fingers weak and trembling.

The steps grow closer as your hearing returns.

You gather the power you have left.

The door opens, but you're already gone.

Hell is thrown into chaos in a matter of seconds.

**

You find your eyes opening to a familiar sight, or, well, as familiar as the ruins (read dusty excuse of an apartment) of your cousin's former home can be.

You brace your self and attempt to process the situation slowly.

Looking down at yourself you notice the bloody clothes, those must go. The hand you place in your head tells you that your hair also needs to be washed, badly.

You sigh and finally get up, hoping against all hopes that the apartment hasn't been ransacked in between your disappearance and now, as you search around you end up finding what you had hoped to come across.

Your cousin had kept it there, hidden, “as a precaution”, he had told you. Under a couple of loose floorboards, he had stored a spare laptop, a couple of hard drives (you never cared to ask for their content), COMPs, money, some clothes and an assortment of other commodities he had deemed important. Back then it was an escape plan from the government or the angels if they decided to attack him. The others had something similar hidden in their own houses.

‘Thank God for Naoya's foresight…’ You barely feel the buzz in the back of your mind at your choice of expletive (you barely register it either, speech patterns surging up as if you had said anything of the like in years), chalking it up to the massive headache you already have.

You take the backpack with the items out and start the laptop while looking at the clothes, wondering, absentmindedly, if you can wear them without looking too out of place. You hope the fashion world didn't move away from jeans and simple t-shirts.

Removing more items from it reveals a flip phone, which miraculously still has service.

The icon with a small cartoonish demon flashing on the upper corner of the phone tells you all you need to know. Right, the babel server.

You put the COMPs aside, not having any use for them as it is, too weak to even establish a mental link with the thing (not that you’d have needed them either if you didn’t feel like passing out). You need to sleep.

A small test in the kitchen reveals what you had already suspected, the water is cut.

At least the laptop is on. Searching through the assortment of pen drives and hard drives you look for one which can give you internet access, before cursing your stupidity and connecting one of the COMPs to the USB entrance.

Shit, it's been really long.

The date at the bottom corner of the device seems to mock you. You let out an exasperated almost pained sigh accompanied by not quite a sob. Your hand falls to the blue object you'd managed to not forget in your haste, and it glows gently, reassuringly.

“You always know what to say, huh, Cain...” a small smile graces your lips despite yourself (how foolish of you). “Okay... Think.”

Tidying up the mess you just made you carefully step outside.

Thanking the stars for the lack of light outside, you walk through a now mostly unfamiliar street, noting the differences. Yongen-jaya being the quiet neighbourhood it has always been, seems to thrive at this time of the day, with people coming back from work and filling the otherwise quiet streets with idle conversation.

The bathhouse still exists even if at a different location.

While it's not exactly empty, you're able to get rid of the bloody clothes, discreetly whipping your back with them to get rid of the dry blood still there,(the newly healed skin feels like a nasty scar against your back and you know right away that it will never quite fade). Towel around your waist you reach to remove your headphones before noting that they aren't there anymore souring your mood.

You swiftly move to the bathing area and turn on the water, in a spot as far away from the other patrons as possible. The warmth makes you hiss, as it burns your chilled skin, the discomfort quickly turns into relief as you scrub your hair with vigour and take the time to note how comforting doing this kind of thing is. You're out as soon as you can and end up dressed in a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants way too big for your frame.

‘Damn Naoya and his height.’ You can’t help but think almost idly.

Your stomach protests and you decide to stop on a Café you had never seen before. ‘Le Blanc’, the sign reads.

The inside looks vintage and the lack of costumers makes you hesitant, but you honestly don't feel like looking for anything else.

If it's edible, you'll take it.

Behind the counter stands a middle-aged man and a young girl, who both turn to you when the bell chimes above your head.

“Welcome to Le Blanc.” the man says in a smooth voice “What will you have?”

The girl's eyes seem to fixate on you, startled. The moment you look back she immediately ducks behind the counter.

Well, that makes things... Not ideal you guess. On one hand, you don’t have to look for persona-users ( her power hugs her almost like a blanket or a second skin, small but enveloping making the otherwise ordinary cafe feel overcharged with the energy) on the other you’ve never found a single one of them easy to talk too. Their strength relies on numbers and you have no doubt that she won’t even consider approaching you (you wonder what you fell like to her)with out back up.

You feel half-annoyed at the extra bullet point added in your ‘shit to do list’ as the man excuses his daughter's behaviour. Something about anxiety.

You don't even need to look at her to know that she's informing half the country that you're here.

“I'll just have whatever you recommend” the man seems to startle at your voice. You wonder if it's because of how much you sound like you were crying (rough and strangled, your words seem to not want to come out) or because of the toneless way it rings in the air.

***

'If anything at least the food is good' you can't help but think as the girl, now alone after almost begging to get her father out of the Café, who ended up leaving her to close it (begrudgingly, you might add), pretends not to be watching you from her place on the opposite side of the store, typing away at a laptop (much thinner than your cousin's, you absently note).

With your own laptop out, you search for your death certificate, out of everything you could be looking for.

You're not dead to the Japanese country as you discover (at some point you wonder if they forgot about you all together and since no death was reported your ‘death’ was never declared). You certainly can't enrol in anything with the age your current documents give you but at least you have a valid identity.

The bell chiming brings about a blond teenager (young adult?) into the previously less uncomfortable space.

“Who are ya’?” The delinquent looking boy spits out, way too close to your face.

You find yourself surprised at the fact that you almost have to bite your tongue to not snap back at this child you’ve never even seen before. Turning your face away you start trying to pack your things.

You can’t deal with this. You can’t. You’re going to…

Your actions seem to infuriate the blond who moves to block your way in a manner that makes you see red.

“Don't play games with me! We know what you are,” he spits out in an accusatory manner.

You feel your whole body trembling with barely suppressed raged and an underlying of raging power.

Persona-users are troublesome in groups but individually someone like the young man in front of you is little more than an overly resistant ant. Before you can decide to calm down or flee or do anything four others make it to the establishment.

“Ryuji, please mind your manners,” a composed brown-haired girl says, only slightly out of breath, even though she looks like she’s been running for a while by her slightly dishevelled hair. A hand is firmly put on the boys, Ryuji your mind supplies, arm holding him back but doing nothing to soothe your nerves.

In the background you notice the other two girls moving towards the redhead with an almost uncanny uneasiness. All your senses seem to be screaming at you and you can feel your headache worsening.

“Sorry for my friend. He didn't mean to be rude we all just had a bit of a scare a moment ago that's all. ” another brunette, this time a pleasant-looking boy says, blocking your view of the girls in the back of the café (you don’t like it that you can’t see them and what their doing, it puts your frayed senses even more on edge)“We do, however, have a couple of questions we'd like to ask if you would indulge us.”

You gesture vaguely to the booth you’re sitting at, hand visibly trembling and posture unwelcoming and aggressive, you can tell that contrarily to the others this one actually holds some power for himself and that this is not a fight you can afford in your current condition. You busy yourself (you need to keep your hands from shaking) by organizing and reorganizing whatever trinkets you had left on the table.

He takes the obvious invitation and soon after you are all sitting down, two of the girls opting to sit on the bar stalls including the redhead whose computer is now facing you (the boy is sitting next to you and feel your skin crawl at the feeling of another human beings closeness).

“Sorry for my lateness.” A boy, and God, you hope it's the last one, barges through the door looking a bit panicked “Futaba, are you okay?”

“I-I'm just fine, Inari” She answers almost dropping her laptop.

You shut off everyone at this point.

You half-look half-glare at the pleasant boy who is obviously in charge. He smiles at you, his expression looks strained and tired.

“Ah, where are my manners...” He says in an almost coy tone. “I'm Goro Akechi, it's a pleasure”

You sigh feeling your actual age, reaching into your pocket to stall for time (you don’t want to actually speak but you have to) and steel yourself for the barrage of questions sure to come. When you look up, they look startled.

“Kazuya Minegishi, pleasure,” you say mustering voice as unfeeling and unmoved as always.

Hesitantly they introduce themselves as well, put on edge by your tone.

“Mineguishi-Kun would you be terribly bothered if we waited a few more seconds?” one of the girls, Okumura, asks in a friendly tone. “There's someone else that needs to get here before we start asking questions, I hope you understand…”

You frown wanting nothing more than to collapse somewhere. You huff in displeasure and nod.

“Can I at least have some more curry then?” you say quietly enough that you think they might have missed it.

One of the boys, Kitagawa, gets up to get it and comes back with two plates of it, digging into one.

“Th-that one's on the h-house,” Sakura says unexpectedly loud. “Since you're complying and stuff.”

You nod. The weight of the silence consumes the room as they seem to mull over their questions. You decide to do the same.

It's only cut by the chiming signal of an incoming video call from a program you don't recognize.

“‘lo? Can you guys hear me?” a boy with an unruly hair calls from the screen as soon as Sakura hits accept, a cat by his side.

“Akira!” the blond girl, Takamaki, calls out “You're really late.”

“Meow, Meow… Mrown”

“Sorry, sorry, …”

“Mineguishi-Kun, this is Akira Kurusu, our leader and there on his left is Morgana.” Akechi says “I believe you can now understand the reason why we needed to wait.”

“Kazuya Minegishi… pleasure” the honorific sounds odd on your tongue (you haven’t been in a position where you’d need to use an honorific to talk respectfully to someone for longer than you could remember)

“If I may avoid small talk, how did you get a persona?” Akechi starts, out of the corner of your eyes you see Nijima rolls her eyes at the overly pleasant smile, interestingly enough their supposed leader doesn't seem bothered by Akechi's initiative.

“I don't have one.” You say simply because it's the truth. “I have a power similar, but not a persona.” You see their septical expressions but don’t bother to elaborate

Then the cat aggressively meows at you. The group glances at the cat and then at you.

The silence persists and you understand that they want some sort of answer, to what, you don't know.

“What!?” You basically snap, your hand smacking the table before you can even register it.

They startle back.

“Oh, our apologies!” Okumura says no doubt trying to mitigate the situation “I guess we're just too used to it...” she giggles self-consciously, “He asked what you were doing at le blanc”

You blink. The cat talks.

Okay then, you’ve seen weirder.

“Eating.” you deadpan “I was hungry.”

“That's it?” Sakamoto sounds sceptical “So what... We ran all this way for f-in’ nothin'?!”

You’re here already so you breath in and prepare yourself to seize the opportunity

“Actually, since I found you I need something.” you pause and think over your words “You guys are persona-users so you should know where I have to go to get to the sea of souls.”

They blink at you.

“The… what?” Kurusu says slowly and you narrow your eyes (that’s the voice of someone who knows exactly what you are talking about) The cat meows and he seems to collect himself “You mean the metaverse?” his expression turns sour in the same way that one fakes tears to appease an angered partner.

“Just a pocket of the collective unconscious.” you don’t try to explain because your positive that there is no need “The collective mind of all of humanity”

“Sounds like the metaverse all right...” Akechi says bitterly “What’s your business there?”

“Messiah of human souls,” you say slowly “I need to talk to him.”

“Who...?” Sakura blurts out “Yaldabaoth…? The Holy Grail?”

“No.” You say making a face that you think conveys your disgust well enough if them relaxing is anything to go by. Even Naoya is displeased with the accusation if the vibration in your pocket is anything to go by “Minato… whatever or Makoto maybe?” You speak slowly as you think. “The God of Human Souls.”

You look directly at this Akira character even as everyone voices their confusion. His face doesn't emote an inch but his eyes are incredibly expressive and betray him even as he tilts his head so that the glare of his glasses hides them.

“And what would you need to talk to that person about, Mineguishi-Kun?” Nijima speaks up this time, fake pleasantness masking surprise and doubt, perhaps a hint of anger too “Morgana, did you know anything about this?”

“Meow...”

Silence follows as everyone seems to mull over their thoughts.

“If Morgana says that it seems right, then there's nothing to doubt,” Kurusu says glancing at the cat “Damn it, talk about wanting some peace for once... Or some answers...” his eyes stop on you this time and they are just as cold as the Messiah's, just as sharp and cutting (just as conniving and expressive and DANGEROUS, your senses scream) “So, Mineguishi-san, Kun, whatever, what do you need with someone like that anyway?”

That puts you in a tough spot.

“None of your business.”

It is and isn’t but you refuse to reveal anything more.

The leader sighs in ‘acceptance’ (he gives up so fast you have to wonder how the others don’t notice)

“Well, whatever the reason, we can't help.” he says “The metaverse has been closed for almost two months now, and we don't know of any other similar places, at least not currently.”

You immediately start getting up.

Kitagawa grabs your arm as you try to leave.

“Wait for a second, ... Let's exchange contacts. ” you look at him and he looks down, “look we spent a year making full use of this power and the answers we got for most of what happened were something along the line of, ‘because that’s how it is’. ” he looks you in the eyes now, determination shining brightly “We want some answers and you want to get to a place we've been in, seems like a fair exchange. ”

You had also wanted answers too, hadn't you? Because it was unfair that you were thrown into the situation that you were and furthermore, it was downright infuriating that nobody was willing to tell you why.

When did you get the answers you sought? When did you forget how much you had desired them?

“Yusuke...” Takamaki says hugging herself as if trying not to show her own desire for the same in her expression.

“Why not,” you say feeling lighter for a second. Maybe there's still something left for you out here.

You take your phone out of the backpack and they collectively blink at it before holding out their own phones, very different from yours.

“What?” you self-consciously mutter and effectively shut down any questions (bright silver eyes follow you closely regardless)

Contacts exchanged and a small argument over first names and last names later and you're ready to go.

“Kazuya-Kun, are you staying long?” Ann-Chan asks “If so, we could always meet in person.”

You consider this. You would but the house isn't your cousins anymore and there's no way in hell that you can stay in Tokyo and just hope that no one comes across your previous enrolment in school or your past as the overlord. A small place would be better.

“No.” You pause “I can always make the trip back if the train isn't too crowded,” you say after a few seconds “I'll keep you updated if I come across anyone of interest.”

“Sure thing, dude,” Ryuji says

You nod less on guard but emotionally exhausted.

“Thank you,” Haru speaks up this time as she smiles kindly (this time it reaches her eyes ) “I hope you manage to find who you are looking for”

“Tell us when you plan on leaving before you do,” Goro says, displeased.

“Will do,” you say before leaving.

You don't remember getting home but there’s a vague memory of passing out once you close the door.

***

Waking up you feel oddly refreshed, slowly with the soft daylight you come to.

You yawn and after changing, make your way to the subway. You enter the first shopping centre that you find and take out a small list of things you need.

By the end of the trip, you have yourself a smartphone, a new laptop and headphones (losing your last ones still leaves a sore taste in your mouth) along with a bunch of necessities, clothes, food you can bring around with you and a new backpack since your cousin's backpack now has blood on it.

When you turn on the phone for the first time you notice that you've been added to a group and with a bit of struggling you assure them that you saw the messages and that you're still in Tokyo.

Ann answers with an absurd amount of emojis you don’t bother trying to understand, you just have to keep up your end of the bargain and not become impossible to reach.

You ignore your phone otherwise.

As you reach a building you never thought you’d have to be in aster becoming an overlord you can’t help but wonder how your life got to this point. Now to convince a poor unsuspecting underpaid lady that you're a lot younger than you are.

Entering the office, you get ready for the trouble you'll be causing, and hope against hope that they don't question it too much.

***

Turns out the lady agrees that there must have been a mistake, and your date of birth is updated to something more reasonable.

New identity card in hand you leave the offices with a slight tilt to your mouth speaking volumes of your good mood for anyone bothered enough to notice.

You're Kazuya Minegishi, age 18 to avoid pesky things like guardians but keep your age reasonable enough to still apply to school.

Your phone blows up in your pocket and you check it ignoring past messages and jumping to the present.

** Yaldababitch can suck a dick: **

****

**Bug:**

-Yo @Kazakhstan

_(You don’t know if the name is supposed to be a joke or something but you honestly don’t care enough)_

-Do you know how to spell that name you said?

-One of the important guy

-?

-I could do some digging

**Inari:**

-Wasn't it Makoto or Minato?

**Bug:**

-Dumb Inari

-I need the Kanji

-Not the hiragwana

-Huragana*

-Hiragana*

-Gifudtxihojig

-Do you have any idea how many different spellings a name can have 

-?

-Plus names like Makoto or Minato are so common in Japan I’d be searching for years

**AKiwi:**

-Plus it'd be at least good to narrow down a time period.

-I can't even imagine the pain of looking through decades of birth certificates.

**Kazakhstan:**

-Don’t bother.

-With these handles, it’s impossible for me to tell who is who.

**Annarchy** :

-Don't think too hard on it

-Not worth it

-Anyway you kno where your heading to

**Kazakhstan:**

-I don't know yet.

-Somewhere small probably.

**Haru-reeee:**

-Did something happen here?

-You sound sad

\---

You hesitate for a second

\---

**Kazakhstan:**

-My cousin used to live here.

-He died.

**Slay'emQUEEN** :

-That's...

-In their name, I'm sorry for prying.

**Kazakhstan:**

-It's fine.

-Who is that supposed to be?

**Inari:**

-Makoto

-It must be impossible for an outsider to decipher our names now that I think about it.

-Even if some of them are just ‘puns’ with the romanji for our names.

-That's Futaba fault

-I’ll remove yours if you wish

**Kazakhstan:**

-Please.

**Inari changed Kazahstan’s nickname to Kazuya**

**Bug:**

-Fuck you too Inari

-Why do you have to ruin everything

**Bug change the group name to Inari ruins everything as usual**

**UGoroCThis:**

-Can you idiots stop blowing my phone?

-Some of us actually have things to do during the holidays.

**AKiwi:**

-Like ending our detective career at 19?

**UGoroCThis:**

-I hate you all.

-And yes

-Very much

-Go chocke on a dick Akira

**WE'RETHEPHANTOMTHIEVES:**

-cHoCkE

**Annarchy:**

-Did you just come back from the dead for that Ryu?

**WE'RETHEPHANTOMTHIEVES:**

-Ann please com it not alive

**Annarchy:**

-Com it

**AKiwi:**

-Cum on it

**AKiwi:**

-Cum on death Ann

**Annarchy:**

-She has to take me out first

-Like

-I'm a traditional lady

-K?

**WE'RETHEPHANTOMTHIEVES:**

-And then u guys ask why I'm never here

\---

You leave your phone be after the conversation is derailed.

\---

**Bug:**

-Guys we tots got sidetracked here

-@Kazuya SPELLING PLZ

***

Choosing a place to move to is harder than you initially thought especially without being able to narrow down which places are worth investigating in the first place (maybe Akira Kurusu will just decide to one day tell you what he knows but that’s as unlikely as it is dangerous so you leave him in the back of your mind for now).

Another problem lays with whoever had been guarding you before you escaped. You don't know who they are but going back to hell is definitely a hard no which is too bad considering you left your wings there and your cape behind in you rush.

Well, whatever.

In the end, you settle for a place with an odd amount of demonic energy.

A small town named Kuoh.


	2. Reminder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You really just want him to leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edited the previous chapter so if Kazuya feels jarring is because in what I had originally written I kept noticing that his personality was very inconsistent throughout so yeah that's been updated if you want to go back and reread it.
> 
> Thanks for the kind comments!

You could have started high school in your third year, like you were supposed to all those years ago, but somehow you felt like you didn't remember nearly enough to just jump into your final year of high school.

You wished you had been wrong about that.

The world, however, is never so kind as to go along with your hopes and dreams so, of course, the first day of classes immediately supports your beliefs.

You weren’t the smartest kid before your life turned into some weird joke, with no payoff, you were always the kind to get slightly above average grades, with the occasional A if the subject matter was interesting. This, however, is ridiculous.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you're aware of having heard this before, but those are crumpled back under memories of the war, hell and even childhood memories of your… brother… cousin.

You try to pay attention, you really do but your mind has always been prone to wandering off and you can’t help but think about everything else that seems to take precedence over it. Like getting Naoya to stop being a glorified necklace and reunite with the people who can help you achieve this only after that will your mind be at ease (it won’t).

Once you come back to yourself the class is already over.

***

School ends and your brain feels like jelly. Your persona-user acquaintances have been blowing up the chat all day but since very little of it had to do with you (Haru-chan had asked how things were going in the new place which you had answered with a reassuring enough reply) you mostly ignored it.

You had intended to go home (as much as an empty apartment can be home) before you saw it from the corner of your eyes.

There was a small church in the distance.

You walked towards it as if beckoned.

Even before knowing who you really were or about God's treatment of your brother, you had never quite liked churches. It might be just as well that your parents weren't Christian and that churches look incredibly intimidating and unwelcoming compared to temples (especially to an already paranoid child like you were).

That paranoia though is what makes you walk towards it this time, steps heavy as if you’re making the trail to your own death.

If you stepped foot there, would God still speak to you? Would he still speak of empty praise and cruel punishment and ask you to rise to an ideal no human could fulfil?

That was one of the things you were most proud of when you dared to look back on what your life was and what you had become. You had walked towards chaos, perhaps not fully aware, but of your own volition.

You had never stopped being human (you had vehemently denied letting go of at least that!) to become a demon or a messiah.

You had kept your fragile soul with you until the end, even after absorbing power beyond your imaginings and being tempted by heaven and hell you had never become Abel, God's favoured, nor Abel, the Demon King.

You had been Abel, the King of Demons, but most of all you had been Kazuya Minegishi, a human boy.

“Kazuya...” he would say sweetly, fondly and you would smile brightly big blue eyes sparkling because when he said it, you could just maybe believe that you could do this.

You had scorned heaven when you learned of its cruelty and hell when you had understood it to be no different.

You only completely embraced humanity, however, when someone else spoke to you.

“Humans are those who stand in-between, choose our own paths and change our fates.” he had spoken quietly voice soft but imposing in the space that was his to rule over as if even he hadn’t been forcibly torn from his humanity “Conviction is power and no one has more conviction than a human being.”

It had impressed you back then how he spoke with such conviction of the beings that Lucifer and YHVH scorned, that devils and angels, lowly creatures as they were thought of as inferior.

“The only thing those have over the ones they look down upon is longevity, they can't change like you can, themselves or the world. ” he had raised his head then, blue-silver eyes piercing yours’ as if judging you and your beliefs. Very few things had scared you like those eyes did since you became the overlord. “You, on the other hand, as well as me and him have both, so tell me, Abel, if you believe that to be your name" those cold eyes zoomed on you as if they could wholly and completely see your story unravel “What are you willing to become?”

The church was now in front of you and God was dead, the paranoia would perhaps never leave you, though. A friend had once compared your behaviour to that of a kid who expected to be hit even when he stood alone, too far away to be touched much less hit, but expecting a strike, nonetheless.

You had accomplished what you had set out to do, but nothing would ever be able to quiet your soul, it seemed.

Your cousin seems equal parts outraged and gleeful as you step towards the heavy doors of the small church.

“Don't be a baby Cain...” you mumble before pushing the door open.

It's abandoned. The cross in the middle of the alter destroyed for some reason. It sends a somewhat unpleasant shiver down your spine, but of course, it does.

You walk closer and up the altar ignoring your brain shooting warnings at you to get away and leave.

You touch the broken-down cross (a symbol of mercy and sacrifice destroyed, just like that) almost reverently as you try to muster up some words to, this time, speak to someone who is truly an ultimately long gone. Mourning is odd for you and in some ways, you can’t help but refuse to mourn this being. Yet, you open your mouth and slowly and quietly let yourself hum to some church song you can’t remember the name of.

You sit down then and only leave when the sun as already gone down, homework’s done for the day.

****

Issei Hyoudou is amusing.

Really there's not much else to say on that matter, other than you don’t believe you’ve ever met anyone quite like this boy.

He's impulsive, and brash and a pervert, all of this while sporting a heart of gold.

“Hyoudou-senpai!” you call out when you see him entering the large doors to the schools main building (you’ve been forcing yourself to speak louder and in fuller sentences and to be anyone that yourself so that maybe you can live long enough), some girls give you dirty and somewhat pained looks, which you ignore.

You don't have any interest in them after all.

As you walk in his direction, skipping steps and all (all of it calculated and done in a way that feels unnatural but looks natural enough), the pendant around your neck hits your chest repeatedly. You can feel annoyance rolling off your brother in waves.

The grin you give at that would have looked genuine if you could even remember what such a thing looks like on your face.

“Hey! Minegishi-Kun!” he greets you with almost as much energy. “Help me tell these guys,” he points at his two friends “how Gremory-senpai would be a better catch then Akeno-senpai!”

You tilt your head and among the cloud of questions, you can feel a silver of fondness for this soul, isn’t that scary? Were you like this too? Were other guys? Or is this one just truly the only of his kind?

“I don’t understand why Hyoudou-senpai keeps asking me these things…” you make an effort to sound coy even though he’s not having it “… when he’s so adamantly ignoring my feelings…” you grin up at him.

You had started doing it because of how uncomfortable it made him, such a thing would stop him from becoming close enough to make you second guess yourself. His response however almost ruins your mood completely.

“Sorry,” he says immediately crossing his arms as if about to deliver a serious speech “I only accept serious proposals from members of the opposite sex with big…!” 

The girls nearby glare at your ‘friends’.

The casual way in which he brushes it off stings you in various ways. You hate that he got used to it to the point of joking about it. You hate that you have less control of this situation than you should.

You hate it, you really do.

“Ah, how sad,” you say taking a step back (you need to regain the space between you) “then I guess you don’t want to know how my study date with Akeno-senpai went…”

“Wait! No,” his outrage was noticeable enough to draw many eyes to the conversation “You can’t do that! How the hell did you get a study date with Akeno-senpai?!?”

Before you can open your mouth and make up some story that does not involve her being suspicious as fuck of your demonic signature, (you’re guessing) fake sobbing makes itself heard

“Of course,…” Matsuda says sounding pained. “I forgot that he's one of them.” He says, adding some more fake sobs at the end.

“A damn bishonen!” Motohama finishes in an almost scream.

Issei seems almost offended, as if he just realised that the two of you are friends at that very moment

“Why do you have to be so goddam nice and pretty huh? What do you have that we don't?” he sounds exasperated.

You blink at him.

“How can Hyoudou-senpai say such a thing and still ignore this one’s…” You stop yourself at the archaic phrasing threatening to leave your lips (demons had such an odd way of speaking perhaps you had picked up on it more than you should have)“…my feelings?”

“Look! I just want to touch some real bazangas for once in my life you know…” he turns around and you try your damn best not to let the sour taste in your mouth make it to your face.”you don’t have any” He sounds almost offended “I don't want to only jack it off to porn either I want like a real woman! Is that too much to ask?!”

Ah, to be young and dumb. And there comes the fondness again overshadowing by very little the resentment.

“Well, maybe they just can't see what I see!” you say this time genuinely enough. It is the truth but you have a space to keep between the two of you so you need to thread carefully. “For real, I'm sure you'll find someone someday.” You say smiling in a way that feels almost natural.

He smiles back at you.

“Hell yeah," he turns back to his real friends, “You hear that?!”

“Dude, who's been denying that?”

“Not us that's for sure...”

“For all of you with no fate in me, I can do it! I'll get to touch some boobs and then all of you will see,” he says before dragging you forward, and you can't help the shiver even as you let out an amused chuckle, your brother’s less than pleased mood « affecting yours.

“Well, he sure is getting something...” Matsuda half mutters.

“Too bad he seems to be playing the wrong field to get some double D’s...” Motohama replies quietly.

***

Your life continues like that for a while, and as you fall into a routine you can't help the giddiness you feel.

You're back.

Completely back.

Living a normal life.

You grin and slowly grins become normal. You're only missing your brother for everything to be perfect.

The church has become somewhat of a commonplace for you to visit, all the better that it’s abandoned.

It is a small comfort you indulge in. One you can almost not feel guilty for.

“Are you religious Minegishi-Kun?” you remember Issei asking once when the two of you were making your way to school, you only gave him a look. “Ah... I don't mean to pry...” he laughed self-consciously gesturing with his hands.

You wonder what your expression had looked like.

“It's just I see you going there a lot after school… or in that direction I guess…” He shrugs without looking you in the face “I don’t know it’s just sort of weird I haven’t been to a church since I was small and not a lot of people in japan do you know…” He seems to mull something over “I could swear it was abandoned too…”

Once you find yourself at the familiar sight with shaky hands you undo the clasp of your necklace letting it fall onto the grass.

Immediately you feel the urge to start singing so you do, even as your brother,no, whatever is left of his soul, calls for you desperately.

You’ve always excelled at ignoring all the blaring sirens in your skull though.

You look up at the cross still humming.

Like a stupid child who fears being hit but always comes back for more, just barely capable of not grovelling in front of its aggressor you always come back.

You feel cold without your brother.

You feel like HE’s watching you.

You feel…

You grab your necklace and run until your legs give out.

***

“Do you think it's weird?” you end up blurring out without really meaning to, without knowing what you want to ask.

“What?” Issei says between bites of his lunch “You not liking girls?” his expression seems somewhat pained at that as if you’ve committed a great sin.

It catches you off guard

“Who says I don't like girls?” He looks unamused and you can't help but punch him lightly on the shoulder “You shouldn't just go assuming those things Hyoudou-senpai."

He shrugs at that before stuffing his face with some rice.

“But you like guys too.” He says as a matter of fact. “It’s fine dude, you do you, just keep the falling for me in the teasing corner.”

Get away from me.

“…that's not where I was going with this conversation.” You pout at him half-heartedly.

You can tell that he notices your mood by the way he shifts slightly away.

Go away.

He nods his head and opens his mouth closing it after as if thinking better of what to say.

“Then... What was it about?” he says, “What has Kazuya Mineguishi in such a twist.”

“Forget it it's dumb.”

“It's not if no-shame extraordinaire manages to look self-conscious…”

You give a shrug.

“Look who's talking.”

“What? At least I admit it!” he says sticking his tongue out “You just act coy and shit.”

“Damn, Issei, you have no game.”

“What do you mean by that?!” he blinks “And just settle for one name and honorific don't keep switching the way you address me!”

“Sure thing, I-tan.”

“That's barely even a name anymore and you know it!”

You miss those who are already gone but thrive on the fact that the world keeps spinning and someone like Issei gets to be the hero of his own story.

(even as you DESPERATELY want him far away)

****

“Hello, Minegishi-Kun”

“Sitri-senpai.” You say trying to seem chipper as you lift the pile of books on your table. “How can I help?”

“Are all of those about religion?” The vice president, Shinra-Senpai, asks a hint of something in her eyes. “Are you religious Minegishi-Kun?” Sitri-senpai looks at her with a brow raised.

You ignore the phantom of devil wings on their backs in favour of closing your eyes and chuckling.

“That would depend on your definition of religious…” You say trying not to show yourself physically nauseous at the question “I'm more interested in the legends I guess.”

She seems relieved and you, not for the first time since joining the school, find yourself wondering why.

“It's an odd hobby for someone your age” The president points out trying to sound aloof and in your honest opinion failing miserably to keep the pressing questions out of her voice.

“My older brother... Or I guess my cousin” you say not sure how to refer to Naoya anymore “Used to tell me religious legends when I was small.”

“Someone you are close to then.”

“Yeah it's a bit nostalgic.” you say trying to sound happy “I used to think he was the coolest for knowing all of those by heart. ” You look at the books again giving up trying to lift them for the time being “He always told them with such spite though, they used to scare me if I’m being completely honest”

Sitri-senpai looks you right in the eyes searching for something, you just smile, a small thing, at her.

“Well, I came to ask what you've been doing on the abandoned church up on the hill,” She says with fake indifference “But it's somewhat hard for me to believe that you are vandalizing it or doing anything illegal in there” you nod at her gratefully but with a more strained smile “Still you shouldn't make it a habit of hanging around abandoned churches especially when you don't even share the religion”

“I'll keep that in mind” you can’t keep the numbness out of your voice.

***

Rias Gremory is a nuisance, pure and simple.

She walks around like she owns the place, holding herself above others like she is inherently better than them.

These new devils are different from the one back when you were in power.

Back then they hadn't been more than the sheep of another Sheppard, obedient, stupid sheep.

They had come into their own in the years after the war you assume, you suspect the demons with power over them might be gone.

Some things, however, never change. Gremory, Sitra and most of the devils you found so far (and this city is full of them) have pride to spare, still looking down on those they find lesser, poor defenceless humans who don't get a choice.

It pisses you off more than it did back then.

It doesn't help that she reminds you of a boy you had met back then, an absolute fool who was tired of being a sheep but wouldn't give up on pretending to be the Sheppard.

Sometimes you feel the urge to put them in their place, to make them look up to your eyes and say to your face that humanity is weak and deserves to be manipulated so that they can live in ‘peace’.

To laugh at them and tell them that this one human who started weak as they come had risen of his own will and conviction to where he was now and had the power to wipe them all from the face of the planet.

Ignorance isn't peace.

Ignorance is what killed people at the Tokyo Lockdown.

It's what made the government believe in the angels that called for the purging of those insides.

It's what made the Demon kings, kings and God, a god.

In the end, you always understand what you're projecting.

You also understand that the last thing you want is to get involved with these people.

Therefore, you pretend to not know.

Fool, right after you complained that ignorance isn’t bliss.

***

Issei has a girlfriend.

You'd be a lot happier (or whatever version of happy you can muster) for him if she didn't feel odd.

You want him far away from you but he already got too close.

You know it because it hurts when he walks to you, Matsuda, and Motohama, grinning like a lovesick puppy, girl on his arm, and introduces her as his girlfriend, Yuma you believe, just for you to be able to tell that she’s playing to win something.

You don't want him to die...

He’s too close.

“Hey, Issei-senpai...”

“Yeah, Kaz?” he mutters dreamily as he stares into the lamp over his head.

He’s, oh, so close.

“I have something for you,” you pause “it's sort of personal, so please take good care of it" untactful.

“Oh, what is it?” he sounds somewhat taken aback like he'll have to be the bearer of bad news.

You sigh loudly and hit the back of his neck.

So very close.

“I'm not confessing or asking you to marry me senpai chill,” you tell him a playful smile just barely pushing the corners of your mouth up. “It's something I've had for a while anyway, more like a good luck charm."

You reach around your neck to unclip the pendant unhappy at parting with it but confident in your decision.

“Here take it” you can't help but tie it around his neck yourself hanging onto the blue crystal for a second before letting go completely.

‘Take care of him for me, Naoya’

‘leave me alone, Naoya’

‘let me go, let me be, get away from me’

"Kazuya,...” he looks at you not seeming to know how to feel.

He's reading the situation wrong, you're not emotional because of his rejection or because you were in love with him like he’s assuming, it’s what you get for acting like you are.

It’s too late for him to get away from the disaster that you are.

You feel more human than you’ve had since you can remember yourself as a person.

You don't have the energy to correct him.

“Don't look at me like that...” you say voice strained (genuinely this time and you have to do a double-take and swallow at how unfamiliar it is for your face and voice to just do things like that.) “It'll protect you.” You know it's a cryptic thing to say but you can't help it. “So, go have fun safely"

“Kazuya, don't cry.” he says reaching out and whipping tears from your face (when did you cry last from something other than excruciating pain?) “Shit, I don't know how to...” he seems to steal himself “I-I...”

“Issei,...”

“I don't like you like that and I'm sorry. ” he says eyes closed tightly “It's just, I don't know, I like spending time with you and joke around and all that, b-but... ”

You chuckle tears still on your eyes and hug him (the unpleasant shiver still shakes you up and you let go almost immediately), your brother's soul reaching out to yours as if to console you.

“Stupid, I told you already, it's not a confession” you shake your head “I'm just sad to see you go, well you and the pendant"

“Okay, dad”

You can’t help the surprised laugh. (for once you can’t help something)

“It's important you know, I never thought I'd let anyone have it... ” you say out of breath "...but you're important too and something tells me you'll need it. ” you smile brightly at him and at your sincerity he smiles and turns back to look at the stone.

“I'll take very good care of it, I promise!” he exclaims, determination shining in his eyes.

“You better, it's one of a kind” you look into the distance “So keep it safe for me, at least, for now.”

It hurts deeply, but you can't help but think it's the right decision.

It's almost scary how you can see Issei going through your own experiences, still smiles and determination, no doubt dealing with things better than you ever could have.

You imagine how he would have interacted with Atsuro or Kiba or Yuzo.

Haru, Jin, Loki.

Midori, Keisuke, Amane

You can almost feel the annoyed fondness of your cousin had he met him back then.

It's odd thinking back so much.

This boy is destined to do great things regardless of what the world might say.

You don't want those pesky THINGS to ruin him.


	3. Rending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I'm glad you guys like this thing! I wasn't very confident when I started posting it so it's a relief! Anyways, the next chapter is already half-written so let's see if I can post it fairly quickly!

When you part with the first year that you've come to call your friend, you can't help the feeling of foreboding, never good, especially when it involves Kazuya.

Really, you’ve learned a long time ago that Kazuya being cryptid leads to some weird shit, like some seriously unexplainable bs. Truly if you didn’t know better, you’d think he’s casting a hoax on you or something, or maybe on himself.

Anyways, Kazuya is a cryptid, therefore you may or may not fear for your life currently.

Even so, you skip to your house happily, somewhat enjoying the silence after the emotional confrontation you've just had to endure. That’s the only good thing about that conversation, the fact that it’s over.

He seemed genuine when he said that it wasn't a confession and you believe him (mostly, sort of). Even knowing he is younger in age than you, you can't help but feel like behind those blue (grey?) eyes of his there's a soul older than you could imagine as cheesy as that sounds. But really! This situation seems like something straight out of some TV show, therefore, you find the quote (can it even be called a quote?) completely justified.

That leads all the teasing and flirting to feel superficial at best, as though he mostly enjoys messing with you.

‘he wasn't messing with you today...’

It puts you on edge and you grab gently the Cristal at the end of the pendant looking it over. Why would he gift it to you?

‘... you're important...’

Important how? This makes no sense.

You vaguely think that the necklace would match his eyes were it not for the glow.

One of a kind he had said.

You scratch your head and sigh.

These things only happen to you, why can't life just be easy for once!

You just got a girlfriend, you shouldn't be on edge like this, you should be planning your date!

“How can I do that when my brain is playing catch up with all this crap!” you say out loud despite yourself.

You feel a surge of annoyance and look around looking for whoever you have just embarrassed yourself in front of.

No one.

Well, way to go when it comes to trying not to feel like you're in imminent danger.

You can’t help but hurry your steps.

***

Your parents are the same as ever and you eat dinner while they idly talk about their day. You vaguely mention hanging out with your friends and having plans for Sunday.

They wouldn't believe you if you said you finally got a girlfriend so you'll, hopefully, bring her to your house personally so you can shove it in their faces.

You end up spending the rest of your afternoon in your bedroom idly reading doujins and the likes, having little to do otherwise.

The texts come a few hours later when you're about to call it a day so that you can wake up fresh and ready for your date.

\---

Kazuya:

Hey

Sorry for being a sap today

I think I've been a bit out of it lately

Issei:

It's chill dude

I'm just very bad at this stuff

Everyone needs to let that stuff out sometimes

Kazuya:

Still

Are you doing anything tomorrow?

\---

You bite your lip at that. Right, you hadn't told him about the date...

Come on, you already know he doesn't have a crush on you! Just spite it out.

\---

Issei:

Well

I was going to

\---

Just say you're going on a date already. You shouldn't lie about where you are going to be especially with all these feelings of wrongness!

\---

Issei:

Go hang out with Matsuda and Motohama

A new video is out and

You can come if you want

I'm sure they wouldn't mind

\---

Shit, what are you doing Issei?!

Just tell him the goddamn truth!

Calm the fuck down he's not saying yes…

“That's not the issue!” you scream to yourself prompting your mom to warn you about the time.

The beeping of your phone drags your eyes down

\---

Kazuya:

Eh, I think I'll pass

Have fun you guys

Issei:

I'll text you after

Kazuya:

I'll hold you to that

\---

Dammit, you can't help but think as you slap your face as strongly as you can.

This is so dumb.

Whatever, it's time to go to sleep, grumpy pants.

You remove the pendant around your neck carefully and even consider asking one of your parents to do it for you before scraping the idea on the pure embarrassment factor.

You look at it fully now and other than the Cristal it's plain, looking like any two-dollar necklace you can buy at some cheap retail store.

The crystal, however, isn't what you were imagining.

He always wears this necklace, it's something you've never seen him without so, even though it’s your first time touching it, it's an item you're familiar with. That being said, in the place of what you thought was a plastic-y and cheap stone thing, there's something that looks and feel a lot more valuable. There’s a weight and shine to it that makes you conclude that if the stone isn’t itself of some precious material or other it’s at the very least expensive enough that your wallet would probably weep if anything happened to it.

You put it carefully on your nightstand and make a note of buying a box for it put it so you can't accidentally knock it off of somewhere.

You go to sleep after that.

***

You wake up full of energy barely remembering the previous days' dilemma then proceed to spend half an hour trying to decide what to wear.

You feel incredibly out of your depth.

Just when you're about to leave, you glance at your nightstand where the pendant is, untouched since you took it off.

Then, (in hindsight) like a fucking idiot, proceed to tell yourself to stop being paranoid and live it be.

That day you make a mistake.

***

You wake up feeling exhausted.

Your body aches horribly and your vision is swimming.

You remember dying.

You jump out of bed and dress as fast as you can, then do a double-take and get Kazuya's pendant, feeling guilty that you had left it behind and kind of stupid for not trusting Kazuya’s cryptic nonsense.

You doubt it could have done anything in this situation, but by God do you wish you had taken it.

You rush to school barely acknowledging your parents.

***

You first find Matsuda and Motohama.

“Yo, dude! ” Matsuo waves at you as you regain your breath “How was your Sunday? ”

“The... Huf... Date... Huf... Yuma...! ” you swallow dry and try again but are interrupted quickly.

“Is that...? ” Motohama points at your chest and it takes you second to realise why.

“Yeah, it's Kazuya's. ” you say quickly “But that's not important! ” you grab their sleeves “The date yesterday! The girl, Yuma, she...! ”

“Wait?! You went on a date with a girl?! ” Matsuda looks betrayed “Why didn't you tell us?! ”

You look at him bewildered.

“What do you mean by that? ” your voice cracks “I introduced her to you both and to Kazuya too! ”

“I think I would remember if you had...”

For a second you just stare before bringing up your phone and trying against all hopes to find some proof that you’ve not gone absolutely insane.

There's no contact under her name.

“Do you feel okay...? ”

“No, I don't feel okay!” You almost scream in your panic.

They look at each other as if trying to figure out what course of action they should take.

“Did you dream that? ” Matsuda says reluctantly, his expression wavering “Or are you just pulling some joke on us…? ”

“I'm not joking! ” you say maybe a little too loudly “And I didn't dream it either! Dammit, you guys!"

“Dude, stop screaming! ” Matsuda pleas putting a hand on you shoulder

“I have to agree with him! ” Motohama nods his head “You sound insane screaming like…!”

“Fine don't believe me,” you say as you storm off.

***

You shouldn't have stormed off.

You should have waited for Kazuya since he isn't in the same class as you. Stupid.

You, aware of the danger of the teacher's wrath (Hidetoshi-sensei, one of the most strict teachers at your school) and of the fact that most of your classmates don't particularly like you and can and will tell on you, take out your phone.

\---

Issei:

Kaz, are you in school?

Kazuya:

'I'll tell you something once I'm out' he says.

Yeah, course I am

Issei:

Sorry about that btw

I'm sort of in the middle of a crisis thougj

Kazuya:

Shoot

Issei:

Do you remember the girl I intrude you to on Saturday?

Kazuya:

Yeah?

Yuma right?

\---

With the confirmation that you're not insane, you feel considerably better.

\---

Issei:

Thank God

Kazuya:

How could I forget you were super hyper about her?

LOL, don't give him that much credit.

Issei:

Something supper weird happened

I was freaking out

Kazuya:

What happened?

Issei:

Let's talk face to face

Forest at lunch?

I'll get rid of Matsuda and Motohama

Kazuya:

K

But are you okay now?

Issei:

I'm not hurt that I can tell?

Other then that

I dunno?

I feel like I'm in shock or smth

Kazuya:

I'll see you then

Relax and try to pay atention

\---

How are you supposed to relax or pay attention?

Whatever you just have to endure one more period, you think as Hidetoshi-sensei leaves but not before giving you a dirty look.

Caught, you guess.

\---

The spot is a familiar one.

Under a tree located a bit farther away from campus where you first met Kazuya as he aimlessly wandered around with seemingly too much on his mind.

Your group usually ate either in your classroom due to most of you being from the same class or under a tree closer to the ORC where it was always a possibility that you’d catch a glimpse of red hair.

Red

Red

Like the blood…

“Issei-senpai? ” you blink and see him waving his hand in front of your face.

He looks hurt and somewhat betrayed and you have to wonder why.

Then he reaches out for something behind you and you feel a jolt of something that shouldn't be there. Then you look back and...

Wings?

Wings.

Wings!

Wings!?

“Aah...!?" you let out a noise you're not proud of and promptly fall on your ass then look at Kazuya and he looks mad.

You’ve never seen Kazuya mad, despite all his posturing and messing around you don’t feel like you’ve seen that many expressions on the other boy’s face. It’s always either a blank look or a slight smile not quite fake but not quite reaching his eyes either.

The blank look had never looked like emptiness though it was always a somewhat pensive expression on him as if he had a lot on his mind but not a lot to say. Right now though you feel like you should run away and if didn’t know better… never mind you do know better, and his eyes are glowing in a way that makes you feel like your livelihood is being threatened.

“Kazuya, ... What...” you feel yourself shiver unpleasantly.

“You didn't take it with you, did you?”

It takes you a second to understand, then you bite your lip and shake your head guiltily feeling like a dumb child being scolded over touching the stove after being repeatedly told not to. It makes you feel like whatever has happened to you is no one else's fault but yours. Indignation rises in you at that as you refuse to swallow such a notion and prepare to refute it.

Before you can, however, slumps down next to you with what sounds like some weird choked sob startling you.

You’ve known from day one that something was wrong with this person. When you first laid eyes on him your first thought was that those eyes were just slightly to empty for someone exploring their new school, that uniform was just slightly too put together to look natural on him, his words were just s a little bit too cutting to pass as anything other than mechanical responses no matter how hard he tried. Your frustration seems to dissipate in the wind with that as you put aside the bad feelings for now.

You attempt to catch his eyes and when you do the glow has stopped and no tears are truly falling even though the sobs continue, as if his body is too numb to his feelings to give a proper emotional response.

“I'm a hypocrite,” he says in between dry sobs and hiccups “I should have told you, but I didn't know how and I didn't know this...” He looks at you with the most hunted look you’ve seen on his face “I'm sorry.”

You immediately grasp his shoulders forcing him to look into your eyes.

“Don't say that! ” you blurt out “I... If you had told me word by word what happened to me yesterday I'd have asked you what you were on. ” You close your eyes, panicked tears threatening to spill “I should have listened to you! I should have taken the necklace! Hell, I don't know why I didn't?! ”

He frowns and shooks his head quickly.

“No. No, I should have told you! ” he covers his eyes with his hands “This is exactly what he did to me back then! Who cares if you didn’t believe or thought I was insane or creepy! How am I any better than Naoya keeping you in the dark like this! What right do I have to have argued and screamed at him back then for what he put me through just to came here and… and…”

He laughs brokenly letting his head fall on your shoulder.

“Holy fuck…” You feel him say against you shoulder more then you hear him “I’m no fucking different! The apple never falls far from the fucking tree does it?!”

“Hey! Hey! ” your breath quickens as you try to pull him out of whatever train of thought he’s delved too deep into “Wait, calm down! It’s fine whatever! Let bygones be bygones and just breathe before you end up collapsing or… something! ”

He makes a questioning noise that doesn’t sound complete coherent yet and you let the two of you bask in the silence until you feel him calm down against your shoulder.

“Are you okay?” You say hesitantly and he nods at you “What was that? What happened? ”

“It's stupid. ”

“Not if it bothers you this much, it isn't... ”

He lifts his head then and his expression betrays nothing.

“Some other time maybe,” he tells you placidly “I don't know exactly how this happened to you but I might be able to fix it if you explain it to me. ”

You nod resolutely and start recounting the previous day.

\---

“So… I'm a devil then...?” you say reaching to touch your wings, which are, admittedly, pretty kickass. “What about you? ”

He tilts his head and you huff.

“What are you, Kazuya?” you clarify “Are you a devil too? I mean you know a lot about this so I assumed… ”

Despite the stone, his face seems to have turned to you can’t shake the feeling that if given the chance he’d dig a hole to hide himself in.

“Nothing good…” he says sounding almost coy “The simple answer would be a Demon Tamer which in and on itself includes a range of things. I can summon demons and use their abilities is the simpler explanation.”

“That's pretty kickass.” you say in a bit of awe “Demons are different from devils, right? You couldn't summon me, right? ”

“There's probably a way to summon you, but... ” he seems to consider it “Maybe summon isn't the right word it's more like a contract? But demons don't say no and you probably could? ” he waves his hands “They don't have feelings in the usual sense like they don't change I guess, they always have a similar reaction? ”

Silence stretches between you.

“I'm sorry, Kaz, but I'm so lost. ”

“It's fine I'm awful at explaining this stuff” he shakes his head slowly “Can you keep it a secret? I'm not supposed to let anyone know that we exist...? ”

You nod your head.

“Thanks. ”

“So what does this do? ” you say twirling the chain around your neck around your fingers

“Um… ” he seems self-conscious “Nevermind that it should be able to protect you a bit but I honestly don’t understand the specifics either” he scratches the back of his head “I would have given you a COMP... Oh, that’s what we use to summon demons, well I… hum… nevermind that… I honestly wouldn’t know how to begin explaining that either… It would probably be useless anyway considering you’d need a lot of training for it to be useful against the likes of the fallen angel you found yesterday. It probably wouldn’t work now anyway since your…” he gestures at your wings “…different.”

The explanation doesn’t satisfy the probing questions you have but you know you’ll have to let it be for now for both of your sakes.

“So,… what now?”

“We go back to class I guess... ” he offers you a hand “ You should get rid of those.”

  1. Right, wings.



Uhm...

Oh, there they go.

You walk with Kazuya back to the main building and fail to notice how the previous darkness that surrounded both of you vanished in an instant.

**

You grip the two bottles of soda in your hand before throwing your friend one.

He sits at the edge of the school roof, legs dangling over the edge. You take no time joining.

“You lied to me,” he says sounding unfairly petulant as far as you are concerned “You didn't say you were going on a date, you said you were hanging out with Matsuda and Motohama.”

He looks at you and you avert your eyes feeling once again wrong.

“Yeah, ... My bad.” You say but can’t put much of an apology in it.

A deafening silence consumes both of you as he takes notice of your reluctance to accept the accusation. You hear him let out a “tsk” before he starts to gulp down his soda and can’t help purposefully looking away from him bitterly.

“I have to go home. ” you say pausing midway through your drink “but there was something I wanted to confirm with you first” you pause for a second “Well, two things. ”

“I have a job interview anyways, shoot. ” he looks towards the horizon as he answers with a cold tone.

“Ok, first, why did you come to this school anyway? I know you’re living alone and moved here specifically for it… ” you move to lay on your back feet still dangling “… so why here?”

He shrugs and you can’t help but feel a little slighted at the lack of care he’s putting into this conversation.

“It’s not a very busy place and it felt weird.”

“That’s it?”

“That’s it.” He leans forwards against the railings “I’m looking for someone so I want to a place where they could be at. There’s nothing more to it.”

“And if you don’t find that person here?”

He looks like he’s contemplating the answer.

“I’ll go look somewhere else.”

He looks somewhat guilty for the first time guilty.

“I guess I got comfortable and forgot.” Comes the mumble.

Despite the ugly feelings shimmering in your heart you have to give and accept that he’s in no condition to offer you much more.

“That... That's fine for now I guess just to keep me updated” you sigh in defeat “As for question number two, how is any of this possible? Turning from a plain old human to this? ”

He turns around then, facing you completely.

“I don't know.” He speaks slowly “it's the first time I see something like this myself, I do know that the number of devils here is considerable and now I think I’m starting to understand why… If the devils themselves are doing this I can probably guess who they are though. ”

You turn your head so fast it's a miracle you didn't give yourself whiplash.

“There are two powerful ones here, presence wise anyways, probably pure-blooded nobility... ” his eyes harden and he glares at nothing in particular “Rias Gremory and Sona Sitri”

You spring up from here you were lying down and get to your feet, he looks at you with a raised brow.

“I knew you'd be surprised but... ”

“It was Rias Grimoire! ” You blurt out

“Don't scream it, the walls have eyes and ears. ” he admonishes you “Are you sure? ” this one is little more than a whisper.

“Sorry! But yeah! ” you mutter to him as some girl passes by the two of you and mutters something along the line of ‘pervs’. “I remember her red hair! ”

You both stay silent for a little before getting up and starting to leave campus.

“Well, I guess having an answer is better than not having any... ” He says rubbing his temples.

“I guess ” you see Matsuda and Motohama in the distance “Well, I'll be going, see you later” you take a few steps before stopping “And your secret is safe with me of course even if she talks to me I'll keep you and your necklace thing out of it.”

“Thanks”

Then you rush to your first friends without looking back.


End file.
